Welcome to Friday Reflections! A weekly newsletter sharing 3 thoughts and things I loved and learned from the week as I navigate learning how to create a life I’m nourished by, and thriving in, without my mom (or caregiving for her).
Hey there!
This week’s been a slow and lazy one.
In the States, we had a long weekend because of Memorial Day on Monday. And because of it, my grandma stayed the night with us for the first time ever!
Our neighborhood is quiet and green, so she spent quite a bit of time rocking outside. :)
And she came at the perfect time; the mosquitoes are JUST now starting to come out. Sigh. So it’ll be time to pull out the pistol soon…1 #Murica
My favorite part of having grandma stay over was bringing home ice cream from our newest favorite ice cream spot, and watching King of the Hill reruns with dad, my little brother, and grandma while we ate.
Lots of laughs and bomb ice cream to end the night? More, please.
Watching people enjoy new things is so fun (both the ice cream and some of the episodes of King of the Hill my dad never saw before made him laugh HARD)!
Also, some news: I know I just started it, but I’ve decided to end the Stardew Diaries series after one more post this upcoming Monday.
I’m having fun writing it! It’s just a matter of priority at this time.
I’m really enjoying the game and notice once I put it down, I wanna move on to something else… but I can’t!
In order to remember the things that happened and what I want to comment on, I need to transfer the Switch photos to my phone (only 10 at a time) and add notes to the draft I’m creating about it.
Instead, I want to be focusing on the pieces I publish on Wednesdays, or adding to the Friday Reflection of the week…
Or, what’s become a larger priority for me lately: continuing to practice drawing comics and illustrations!
So the series is going away for now. In a perfect world, maybe someday I can stream the game on Fridays.
Just need to understand the tech and get the gear!
Until then, I’m ending the run so I can focus on continuing to learn how to draw and create comics… When I’m not writing my other weekly pieces.
I hope you understand!
Also a big shoutout to my first yearly paid subbie! I hear mixed reviews all around Substack about shouting out paid subscribers by name or publication, so I think this is what I’ll always do send my thanks publically, but vaguely.
Because I really appreciate it!
And, as always, I will say I appreciate EVERYONE who takes the time out to comment and share.
Now on to this week’s finds.
So I’ve noticed with some of the media I consumed this week, that there’s been a pattern around honesty.
Breaking this mold that we know what someone’s thinking and what their intent is. Or trying to save face and cling to our pride when we do something embarrassing or are nervous or scared to do something new.
Africa Brooke talks about this in her more recent podcast episode called Are you killing intimacy by avoiding conflict? It’s a brief mention, but she shares how she and her cousin had a slight falling-out that hung over their heads for seven years!
Eventually, Africa was held accountable to reach out to the cousin and everything was talked out and fine! And made into a bigger deal than it really was.
Our minds can really race to conclusions, and grow these stories that are purely just assumptions.
Though Africa’s main point was so important and hit home2, the idea around being honest with ourselves, what we need, and sharing that with others can be quite a game-changer!
Realistically, that level of vulnerability is scary! So maybe we can start smaller:
Mention to your community that you’re nervous to post a telling piece.
Share with someone you trust and can witness you, that you do miss being in a relationship.
While you’re chatting with someone new at a party and if you’re feeling a little anxious and would rather be cozied up at home, share that.
Be contextual with when and how you’re sharing these things, but I think it’d be an even better beginning practice to just become more self-aware when you’re feeling vulnerable or societally “shamed” thoughts that maybe aren’t so shameful after all.
They may just be innocently human.
Thing Two: THERE’S STILL TIME!! GET THE COOKIE!!
Okay so if you have a Crumbl cookie near you, and you like fresh-tasting berry jams and tasty cream cheese frostings and cinnamony oatmeal cookies… You’ll LOVE Crumbl cookie’s Triple Berry Cobbler cookie!
Here’s their official description:
QUOTE GRAPHIC HERE: An oaty trio of strawberry, blueberry, and raspberry, swirled with delicious cinnamon cream cheese frosting and decorated with a dash of cinnamon streusel.
It was mine and my mom’s favorite cookie from them so far; we ordered three within the week!
It first debuted in October last year and hasn’t come back until this week. SEVEN months we’ve had to wait!
But it’s here, and I highly recommend it if you love Crumbl, or want to try it for the first time.
I’d like you to try something: start to practice self-awareness by taking notice of when you feel a bit “blah” when interacting with something.
I’ll use myself as an example:
I noticed that some of my pants are just a bit too big. When I’m out, I notice I’m always pulling them up. Or if my hands are full, then I feel them sagging and know they look horrific.
You could be due for a small upgrade.
I bought some seamless belts from Amazon to help with the constantly sagging pants (and also gets rid of the bulge when your shirt’s over belted pants!).
I originally went on to get some affordable indoor shoes for when I walk on my desk treadmill because my feet hurt after some time. So I got those, and debated buying some arch supports since all the shoes seemed to be pretty flat.
Had to gently scold myself about taking care of myself. Mom always told me to take care of my body; spend money on my body if nothing else…
And I also made a promise to myself to listen to my needs more!
I got two other things to “fix” issues I’ve been having but have yet to address, and it feels good!
Small fixes can make quite a big impact on your mood!
A pretty simple week this week, so thanks for being here whether I have something exciting, bad, or sad to share.
Don’t forget I’m offering 20% off forever if you become a subscriber by June 10th! I’m celebrating going all in on my newsletter by returning to IG to talk about it there, too. :)
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I’ll see you next week; Happy June!
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1
I am absolutely kidding about the pistol, but not the America part. But if you have any tips or tricks you swear by that repels mosquitos from the home, garages, rooms, and bodies… I’d LOVE to hear about it in the comments!
2
Her main point was that a lot of us have never seen actual repair when (healthy) conflict occurs. How when we avoid conflict, we miss out on deeper and more expansive relationships in our lives because we’re shaming a part of ourselves that actually needs others or to listen better or be more flexible with hearing others rather than cutting them off with a quickness… because we’re unable to deal with conflict to even give a relationship a chance to be mended.
